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Struggling to make friends at university? You’re definitely not alone — and here’s the good news: you don’t have to change who you are to build real friendships.
In this guide, we’ll explore how to make friends at university as an introvert, step-by-step. From navigating Fresher’s Week to building meaningful connections, these practical tips will help you feel more confident and connected — while staying true to yourself.
🌱 The Truth About Making Friends at University
Let’s be honest — most advice sounds the same: “Join every society! Go clubbing! Say yes to everything!”
But what if loud parties and constant small talk just aren’t your thing?
Here’s the truth: there isn’t one “right” way to make friends at uni. What really matters is finding people who connect with you — your energy, your interests, and your pace.
According to Student Minds UK, nearly 1 in 3 university students feel lonely at some point during their first term. That means feeling unsure or disconnected is far more common than you think.
🎯 The key takeaway: You don’t have to fake confidence or push yourself into uncomfortable spaces. You just need to create the right ones.
💬 Being an Introvert at University Isn’t a Problem
If you recharge by spending time alone, prefer smaller gatherings, or enjoy quiet nights in — that’s not a flaw. That’s simply being introverted.
Psychology research shows introverts form deeper and more meaningful relationships because they value authentic conversations over superficial connections.
You might love Netflix marathons, journaling, or gaming — and that’s perfectly fine. These personal interests can become bridges to meeting like-minded people.
“A man can be himself only so long as he is alone…” — Arthur Schopenhauer
Translated, being comfortable in your own company is the foundation for genuine friendships!
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🤝 Feeling Lonely at Uni? Let’s Talk About It
Almost every student experiences loneliness at some point. But forcing yourself into crowded events or situations that drain you can make you feel even more isolated.
Instead:
- Attend smaller events or workshops — think book clubs, volunteering, or study meetups.
- Start conversations in everyday moments — like while waiting for coffee, or before class.
- Take it slow — real friendships take time, and that’s okay.
According to UCAS, over 60% of students find friends through shared academic or hobby-based interests, not parties. So don’t feel pressured to “perform” socially — you’ll attract the right people when you’re being authentic.
🎮 Should You Join a Society? (Yes, But Be Selective)
Societies can be fantastic for meeting people — if they align with your interests.
Join the gaming society if you love gaming, or the photography club if you’re into visual arts. It’s not about quantity; it’s about quality.
When you engage in activities you genuinely enjoy, your natural enthusiasm shines through, making it easier to connect with others.
🌟 Pro tip: Go to a taster session or social first — no pressure to sign up until you’ve felt the vibe.
Check your university’s Students’ Union website for societies that match your hobbies.
🍵 “I Don’t Drink — Can I Still Make Friends at University?”
Absolutely. Not every friendship begins over a pint. Many students are opting for sober meetups, coffee socials, or hobby-based groups.
The Guardian reported a 30% increase in alcohol-free events across UK campuses post-pandemic.
Here are great ways to meet people outside the club scene:
- Attend coffee mornings or mental health drop-ins.
- Host a film night or board game evening in your flat.
- Join fitness or creative societies (yoga, art, dance).
Confidence comes from being comfortable with your own choices — and that’s magnetic.
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💡 How to Start Real Conversations (Even If You’re Shy)
Forget the pressure to be witty or extroverted. The best conversations start with curiosity.
Here’s how to ease into it:
- Compliment something genuine: “That’s a cool laptop sticker — are you into that band?”
- Ask about shared experiences: “How did you find that lecture?”
- Use humour to break the ice — it humanises you instantly.
According to psychology research, showing vulnerability — like admitting you’re nervous about starting uni — actually makes people like you more. It builds trust.
🧠 Remember: Connection > perfection.
🌻 The Power of Being Yourself
You don’t need to reinvent your personality to make friends. Pretending to be someone you’re not will only leave you feeling disconnected.
Be open, kind, and curious — people gravitate toward authenticity.
If someone thinks you’re “quiet” or “different”, that’s fine. Your tribe will find you.
Real friends won’t ask you to be louder — they’ll lean in to listen.
🚀 Build Confidence First
If meeting new people still feels daunting, work on your confidence gradually:
- Practice small talk with classmates.
- Join online uni groups before you arrive.
- Focus on what you can control — your body language, tone, and openness.
Confidence doesn’t mean being the loudest in the room. It’s about feeling comfortable in your own skin.
📖 Read next: Our guide on How to Build Confidence at University, real tips that work.
🧩 Quick Comparison Table: Introvert vs Extrovert Social Strategies
| Personality Type | Best Social Spaces | Social Strengths | Common Challenge | Top Tip |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 🌿 Introvert | Small groups, 1-to-1 chats, online communities | Deep, meaningful connections | Overthinking interactions | Focus on shared hobbies & self-kindness |
| 🌞 Extrovert | Parties, large events, group hangouts | Energy and enthusiasm | Burnout, shallow connections | Slow down & deepen key friendships |
🔍 FAQs: Making Friends at University as an Introvert
By joining small, interest-based activities and connecting over shared passions. You don’t need to attend every social — consistency and authenticity matter most.
No — but they can help. Choose ones aligned with what you genuinely enjoy to ensure natural connections.
Start with low-pressure environments like study groups or volunteering. Gradually push comfort zones and celebrate small wins.
Yes! Coffee dates, hobby meetups, or fitness sessions can be more meaningful ways to bond.
Very. Mind UK reports over 60% of students experience loneliness in their first term — it’s normal and temporary.
Join niche societies, attend workshops, or participate in volunteering programs through your Students’ Union.
Never. Authenticity builds stronger, lasting friendships.
Absolutely. Introverts often make thoughtful, empathetic leaders who excel in planning and listening.
Friendships take time — usually weeks or months to solidify. Be patient with yourself.
Reach out for support — university wellbeing services or Student Minds UK offer free guidance. Remember, asking for help shows strength, not weakness.
🌟 Final Thoughts: Making Friends as an Introvert at University
Making friends as an introvert isn’t about changing who you are — it’s about owning it.
By showing up authentically, joining spaces that feel comfortable, and valuing quality over quantity, you’ll attract the right people into your life.
So take a deep breath, step into your new chapter, and remember:
💬 You don’t have to be loud to be heard — you just have to be real.
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